So I just posted this article about “9 things to know before you turn 30” and was thinking,
“What would have been some things that I needed to know before I turned 21?”
Turning 21, like turning 30 is huge for some. Unlike 30, no one thinks that you are an “official adult”, but there are some assumptions that are carried with it. When you’re 21, you’re told that you are supposedly now responsible to consume alcoholic beverages and that you now need to really have your 5 year plan together for that college degree you’re about to get. It’s also that turning point of your life where you might still find yourself living at home, but not wanting to, but can’t afford to move, but you act like at any moment you could do it if you really wanted to because – after all – you’re 21.
21 is complicated time – like I assume 30 could be – but even more so because of something I first hear phrased in a Johm Mayer song. Something called ‘The Quarter-Life Crisis.” It’s that weird but yet exciting time in your life from about 21-27 that you experience. I’m not sure if I’m totally through it, but I have definitely been navigating it for a while.
So as I think about turning 30, I’m sure there are some things that I wish I could tell my 21 year old self if I had a DeLorean and a Flux Capacitor sitting around the house. You may agree or disagree, but since this is my blog, here’s my opinion.
1. Don’t bleach your hair too much.
It will fall out. Trust me.
2. You don’t have to prove anything.
This is personal to me, so if you don’t or didn’t struggle with this, good for you! Otherwise, understanding this principle by 21 could have saved me a lot of pain. John Maxwell talks about his early years and that one of his biggest regrets was that he was trying to “get ahead” by correcting others when he should have been trying to connect with others.
When you hit 21, it’s a good point in your life to realize you’re not 16. You don’t have to keep trying to prove to the “adults” that they are wrong and that they don’t have a clue – because now you’re one of them!
3. Forgive… your parents, that friend, etc.
If you don’t have an issue here, skip this. If you’re like 99% of people, you are probably holding some type of unforgiveness towards someone. My pastor often tells us “You are shaped by your past, but you don’t have to be controlled by it.”
If I am making it sound like this is something easy to do….forgive me;) I know it’s not always that easy, and I know that there are circumstances that can emotionally scar someone deeply. I can’t prescribe the “how”, but what I am saying is that 21 is a good time to realize the need.
4. What is your 5 year plan?
In my own opinion, you can only complain about your life when you are 26 when your well thought out 5 year plan doesn’t come through. If you think having a 5 year plan resembles a “money-driven” or “sell out” perspective, then you probably aren’t familiar with the end of Luke 14. You can’t expect to make something out of your life if you’re only hoping for something out of your life. You have to have a plan…a good one that requires hard work, responsibility, integrity, and stewardship.
